Oops

Well well well…

God had other plans. From “The Single Life with Kim” to “The Momma Life with Kim”.

Richard and I were dating, both made it clear that we were dating with a purpose. There were some things that kept standing in the way of us making anything official. I was hard headed (still am) and he was always right (rolls eyes). We just couldn’t see eye to eye… This lasted for less than two months… In my mind, I was like well, there are other fishes in the sea… if he ain’t it, oh well… I kept dating other people, but secretly wanting to pursue something more with him.

Richard and I left our situationship on bad terms, but that’s a story for another time…

My best friend celebrated her birthday in Vegas and boy did we have a good time. I thought “my poor kidney’s”, but in reality, who knew at that moment of being a bad *shut your mouth* I was pregnant. It was a matter of weeks that I started feeling sick after attending a friend’s wedding, with my bestie Laury. I blamed it on food and alcohol for a whole week before taking 6 pregnancy tests later that week and that’s when I felt my WHOLE WORLD crashing down on me. Here I am, pregnant, not planned, with no man by my side, and scared to death. Over and over I kept thinking… I f*d my life up. I didn’t know what to do. I cried and cried to myself before typing in, on my phone “abortion clinics near me”. The very first person I told was my brother. He asked me “What are you going to do?” All I could say was ” I can’t do it”. He watched me cry and said “Kim, if you decide to have this baby, I will be here for you, and if you decide that you won’t go through with it, I will still be here, but remember, you are almost 30. The fear you have is telling mom and dad and you’re no longer a kid”. What a wise man! He was right.. I never wanted my parents to be disappointed in me. I decided to tell a friend and she supported me to the abortion clinic.

There I was, sitting next to a row of women, young and old. All of us deciding the same thing, to terminate our pregnancies. I finally decided as I sat there, crying, to text Richard and tell him that I was pregnant and that I wasn’t going to go through with it. Immediately, he called me over and over. So many signs to get up and leave, but my mind was all over the place. I kept ignoring his calls because I didn’t want him to fog my thoughts. After my first visit, I scheduled the procedure for the following day ( I had to speak to a counselor prior to making my decision). My thoughts and my fear took over completely. Richard convinced me to meet up with him to talk about my decision.

We met in a parking lot and I cried my heart out. At this point Richard laughs, then smiles and says ” I’m so happy.” I’m like WTF…. I’m not (lol). He then expresses to me that he manifested what he wanted and that was me and a family. I then knew that this man who wanted a family, love and loyalty was what I have been looking for. That was when we decided to do this together. Here we were, pregnant and dating. Now it was time to tell our family….

Richard was the sweetest. He coached me on how to tell my parents since I was so scared lol. Once I went home, my mom was on the couch, on facebook, in such a great mood until I told her I was pregnant. I’m such a goof ball that she didn’t believe me at first, until my facial expression said it all. She was not happy, nor mad. She just couldn’t process how I waited until 29 to screw up. It was then time to tell my dad. All he said was “What are you going to do?” I got tired of hearing that question from people and started saying “I don’t know.” I knew though. As I walked away, my dad said ” we’re going to have a baby in this house.” I knew he was happy. Eventually a few days later, my mom and I had a deep conversation (that’s another story for another day) and she accepted and was so happy to be a grandma, finally. I’ll leave you with this… My parents told me to not worry about no man, that they would help me and I didn’t need the man’s help. Little did they/we know… Richard would love me and his child like no other.

As I share this story with you, I also share that Richard and I have officially made 1 year together with our now 4 month old baby. Crazy huh? lol. We laugh about it now, but God does things for a reason and I am so happy that I did not follow through with the abortion. I gained a beautiful baby boy, a beautiful man who would do anything for us.

Happy 1 year Anniversary baby! I love you and thank you for all that you do for us !!!

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